Before you go to dinner tomorrow, especially if you are sharing your Thanksgiving dinner with family or close friends, you might want to ask yourself this important question. Am I grateful “to” these people I care so deeply about – or – am I grateful “for” them. There is a difference and it is an important difference because one leads to a relationship with strings attached, and the other does not.

Here is how The ELF explained that difference to Tony in “Go to ELF – Connecting With The Eternal Life Force”


“Now, back to your original question, Tony. What would you like to know about gratefulness?”

“When I’m expressing my gratefulness, who am I expressing it to?”

“Ah, that is a very good question. There is a really big difference between being grateful ‘to’ and being grateful ‘for,’ Tony. Being grateful ‘to’ creates negative energy, and being grateful ‘for’ creates positive energy.

iou  “Let me give you an example. Someone does you a big favor and you immediately feel grateful ‘to’ him or her for it. That type of gratefulness carries with it a sense of indebtedness. Someday, it will be ‘payback’ time. The words you say to them as you thank them actually translate to some form of ‘I owe you one.’ Whenever you feel as if you owe someone for something, you are automatically creating debt, and debt conjures up a ‘feel bad’ energy that can easily keep you mired in more debt. Be very careful, Tony, of ever being grateful ‘to’ anyone unless you really do intend to pay them back.

“However, whenever you are grateful ‘for’ something, your joyful feelings bring forth a strong, ‘feel-good’ energy. Therefore, they attract more things for which to be grateful. I find that those who regularly express gratefulness ‘for’ life itself, for example, live in a constant state of wellbeing. They feel good about themselves and about everyone else, too.

“It will really help you a lot to get a handle on this concept, Tony. Let me ask you. When you think about the money your father just sent you, do you feel grateful ‘to,’ or grateful ‘for’ him for sharing his winnings with you?”

“Both, I guess.”

“That’s an honest answer, but let’s take a look at which feels better. Feeling grateful ‘to’ him is generated by your intellect, and I’ve heard you thinking that if he ever needs you, you’ll be there for him. Those are thoughts of indebtedness, which can easily slip into more specific thoughts of indebtedness, such as, ‘Someday Dad will need me to take care of him.’ Thinking that way doesn’t feel very good, does it Tony? Those negative feelings are me signaling you that you are thinking about a situation that you don’t want, and Luca doesn’t want, either. It will serve you both much better if you stop feeling grateful ‘to’ your father, Tony, and start feeling grateful ‘for’ him.

grateful-for1 “When you feel grateful ‘for’ your father, those grateful thoughts are coming from your heart. They slip right into thoughts about what a good man Luca is, how much he has taught you through the years, how generous he is, how much you enjoy his sense of fun, and all kinds of other good things about him that you want to continue to experience. Thoughts like that make it possible for me to give you even more reasons to be grateful ‘for’ your father, Tony. And they are already on the way, I promise you. Are you feeling the difference, Tony, between being grateful ‘to’ and being grateful ‘for’?”

“I am, and I think I also hear you saying that I can tell whether I am feeling grateful ‘to’ something or ‘for’ something by the way I feel. As long as I’m feeling really good about something, I’m actually feeling grateful ‘for’ it; therefore, I am automatically asking you to give me more of it,” Tony answered.

“That’s right. Being grateful is a very pure form of asking for more of the same, and since you have already collected whatever you are expressing gratefulness ‘for,’ it is easy for you to believe that you will be able to collect it again.”


 Happy Thanksgiving  – may your year be blessed with countless people and things “for” which to be grateful!



Good Life” tools from The ELF –


abc“Remember your A- B- C’s!”

Using the Law of Attraction and the teachings of Jesus – both – the rules for manifesting the things you want to experience in your life are amazingly simple – simple to understand but for most of us, a bit more difficult to follow.

The Law of Attraction says – Faithful thoughts produce tangible results – every time.

Jesus said, “And all things, whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive.”Matthew 21:22

The ELF says that the simplest way to manifest what you want is to remember that the formula for manifestation is as easy as A-B-C – A sk, B elive, C ollect.


Why is ASKING important? After all, Jesus also said that your Father in heaven already knows what you want.  True – but for the most part, we don’t know what we want or at least not with enough clarity for The Law of Attraction to kick into high gear.  It is by ASKING, and then adjusting our thinking and then ASKING again, and then adjusting our thinking, and then ASKING again – that we finally gain clarity about exactly what we want to receive.


Why is BELIEVING important?  God can only do for us what God can do through us.  We have to know that what we are ASKING to have happen will happen (as long as we stay out of the way and allow it to) before God can proceed. And the – we have to BELIEVE specifically that God will give us what we are asking for.  The Law of Attraction also calls for “faithful” thoughts – thoughts held in our minds mind over a period of time – in order to give us total manifestation. It is in the process of holding the thoughts for a sustained period that we demonstrate our BELIEF or TRUST in the process.


Why is standing ready to COLLECT important? After all, wouldn’t it be ridiculous for us to ASK for something, BELIEVE that we will receive it and then refuse to COLLECT it when it arrives?  One would think so, but it happens all the time because we have pre-conceived ideas about the channel or channels through which our prayers are going to be answered. If what we ASKED for and BELIEVED would manifest arrives on a different bus than the one we were expecting– we may be unsure about whether we should accept it or not.


Let’s look at how A-B-C formula actually works in real life:-

ASKING – Train of thought: “I’m really tired of leaving home feeling afraid that my car will act up and I’ll have car problems before I get back home again. I definitely want a new car. But what if I buy a car that isn’t any better than this one, or I can’t make the car payment, or the price of gas goes too high for me to be able to afford to fill the new tank?”

Whenever we have back and forth thoughts like that – both the Universe and the Law of Attraction go on hold until we decide whether we really want a new car of not.  When we finally and firmly make up our minds – then our new car will begin heading in your new direction.

BELIEVING – Train of thought – “OK, I’m ready for my new car. I’ve made up my mind that what I really want is a Honda CRV – my friend has one and loves it and everything I like to carry with me when I go to the beach will fit into it easily.  But I know that it’s more expensive than I’ve been thinking about paying, and I don’t have any idea where the extra money for one would come from, and I’ve never asked for anything this expensive before. I really would settle for something less if I’m not supposed to have a CRV.  Any new car will do, really, because I can’t make it with my current car any longer – I just can’t”. 

And God and the Law of Attraction say, ‘Your part is to ASK and BELIEVE and our part is to provide. Until you trust that we’ll keep our part of the bargain, we can’t provide.”

COLLECTING -Train of thought – “Gee Mom, it’s really nice of you to offer to buy me your neighbor’s CRV. I’m so sorry she died and I know you’ll miss her and, and I’m sure her car has hardly any miles on it like you said, but I can’t accept that big a gift from you, Mom.  You don’t really have that much money to spend on me, even if this car is a bargain.  No now, you save your money because you may need it someday and I may not be in a position to help you when you do.  Don’t worry any more about me getting a new car. God is taking care of it for me.”

And God and the Law of Attraction just sigh.

In the book, “Go to ELF! – Connecting With The Eternal Life Force”, Tony ponders the formula – A sk, B elieve, C ollect and then he says to The ELF –

“A – B – C – I just can hardly believe it can be that easy.” 

To which The ELF replies – “Well Tony, there’s nothing I can do to make it more complicated for you.””

Here is what makes it complicated – and it has nothing to do with the formula –

  • We often have trouble making up our minds about exactly what we want.
  • We can’t quite believe that we’re worthy of receiving the desires of our heart.
  • We want to control how we receive what God gives us instead of simply saying “Thank You” whenever and however it is delivered.


What does it take for us to stop making those fatal mistakes over and over again?

Practice, practice, practice – –


“Good Life” tools from The ELF –

“Dismantle Your Boxes”

In “Go to ELF!” connecting with the Eternal Life Force, the ELF tells Tony that he had built a mental box around a challenge that he had and that the reason he couldn’t see a very obvious solution was that the walls of his box limited his view of possible solutions..

As soon as Tony released his self-imposed barriers, a simple, more than satisfying solution presented itself.

“Does everyone build boxes like I did?” Tony asked

Sandy's ELF -7“Everyone – and most people don’t even know they have built them,” the ELF advised.

We build boxes whenever we pre-suppose our limitations.  This particular situation, shared by Rev. Wendy Craig Purcell, is about her experience in knocking down the walls of a box of limitation that she experienced when her church bought a new building.

It was an unusual building for a church to begin with.   It was located at the mouth of an industrial center in a three story brick building that the developer had completed on the exterior, to stand as a model for the style of buildings that would be built throughout the industrial center; but he had never finished the interior of the model building.

What they bought was an empty, three story shell.  They hired an architect to finish the building to meet their needs and the first question he asked Wendy was where she would like to put the front door.

“Well, I’d like it here, with easy access from the parking lot and away from the traffic,” she told him, “but because of the way the building sits on the land, I realize that isn’t possible.”

“Lesson #1 in the art of building design.,” the architect told her.  “Never let problem solving interfere with decision making.”

Think about it, because that was exactly The ELF’s message to Tony.  Look at the big picture and figure out what the best possible outcome will be for you.   As soon as you do, tools and resources and support people will come into your life to help you create the solution you really want – in spite of what appear to be obstacles.

Here’s a way too common example.  You own your own home, you’ve lived there for years and it was the perfect home for you and your family.  But now you are retired and the upkeep is eating onto your income, which is much less than it used to be.  You can see  your savings slipping away to pay for the upkeep.

Here’s your box.  The house is costing you too much to keep and if you sell it, you release your last major asset. When the money you make from the sale of the house is gone, you’ll have nothing else to live on that you can identify right now. So you’ve gone back and forth between two choices  – keep the house . . ., sell the house . . ., keep the house . . ., sell teh house . . .until you’re going crazy.

But if you stop, and ask yourself, “What do I really want?  If there were no limitations, what would be my real choice for a retirement home?  Then relax and let your inner wisdom offer you solutions – all sorts of solutions will appear; which might include but are not limited to a smaller house, a condominium, a rental apartment, a roommate, a reverse mortgage, a minor remodel to allow for a tenant, etc.. Once you have a new vision, you can open to a new plan and then all sorts of new solutions are revealed..

Have you boxed yourself in lately?  Are  you jockeying between limited choices and none that really satisfy you? “I can’t do this because . . ., but I can’t do that either because . . .”

Ask yourself this. “If I had no limitations, what would be the ideal solution?”  Almost certainly it will alert you to a third choice (or more) that, although you probably wouldn’t have ever considered it before, will provide you with all the desires of your heart.


ELF Quotes

invisible-man” ‘Has he totally lost his mind?” I hear you say that a lot when someone’s bizarre behavior puzzles you – and the answer is, believe it or not, ‘yes” – except for the “totally” part. Your human mind has some limitations – some boundaries – and it can get so confused within those boundaries that it loses its ability to reason, at least temporarily. When that happens, your human behavior is apt to get a bit strange. But the good news is – ultimately you are intimately connected to Divine Mind which is always steady, sure, sensible, kind, intelligent, joyful and a whole bunch of adjectives that are only used in Eternity. So – relax – no one can lose his or her mind forever. Infinite hope abounds. ” – The ELF


non-violent-women“I find myself fascinated by the ads on your televisions for new cars that have automatic braking systems. They stop the car before you run into something or someone and that can only be a good thing. Do you know you have an internal braking system that will also keep you out of trouble if you’re awake enough to recognize it? It’s ME! I will always send you a signal to stop in time – a really bad feeling that clearly means STOP – CAUTION NEEDED HERE. All you have to do is learn to pay attention to that feeling and act accordingly” – THE ELF


23438_wrensite_dancingsnoopy“How often to you feel this kind of “vibrating happy” like one of your most outstanding contemporary philosophers is illustrating below? Not to often, I know because I am you and you are me, everywhere and always. You came to planet earth to be happy – but happy doesn’t always have to mean giddy. Often happiness expresses itself in a simple sigh – a sigh of satisfaction for a completed task, a sigh of enjoyment over something that tickles one of your senses, a sigh of wonder when you see something beautiful. It’s perfectly OK to sigh your way happy.” – The ELF


spiritual-awakening35  “If you are an American, today your world is tinged with fear because a terrorist attack has taken place in New York City – and another possibly in New Jersey and another possibly in Minnesota. It feels to you that your safety is in jeopardy and it’s not a good feeling. Take a minute to send love and energy to your fellow human beings (the other parts of you) that have been injured. Take another minute to send compassionate thoughts to the many troubled souls around the world that are drawn to violence, – AND THEN PUT THE WHOLE SUBJECT OUT OF YOUR MIND. Your world, your personal world, will be much safer if you think thoughts of peace, love, joy and kindness consistently – THE ELF


spiritual-awakening-4   “True, the you that you can see in the mirror may or may not feel very powerful on any given day – but when you remember that I am you and you are me, everywhere and always – and – that through me you are intimately connected to all of the POWER OF THE UNIVERSE, then there is nothing that you sincerely want that you can’t be, do or have. Of course you have to stay connected, just like a lamp has to stay plugged in to fully shine, but once you get the hang of it – “Oh the Places You’ll Go!” – The ELF

A New Perspective

Sandy's ELF -7In  GO TO ELF! – Connecting With The Eternal Life Force, the ELF speaks to Tony about the importance of focusing on what he wants and not what he doesn’t want by pointing out to him the changes his Father made in his thinking that allowed him to win the lottery..

“Would you be interested in knowing why your father won the lottery this time, Tony, when he’s been buying a ticket every week since the Florida Lottery began in 1988 and never won before?”

“Yeah. I’d be very interested in knowing that.”

“Every time Luca bought a lottery ticket, he informed me by the simple act of buying the ticket that he would like to win the lottery. But at the same time he bought every one of those tickets, he would also say to himself or to anyone who would listen, ‘I don’t know why I’m wasting my money on this ticket, because the chances of me winning the lottery are somewhere between slim and none.’”

“That’s true,” Tony said. “I’ve heard him say that myself.”

“Time after time, he took a step toward what he wanted by buying the ticket, and at exactly the same time, he took a step back from what he wanted by believing there was almost no chance he would win. Almost everyone does the same thing, Tony, not just Luca. I call it ‘yes-no thinking.’ It’s like trying to drive a bus with the gas and the brake on at the same time. It doesn’t work.

“But this time was different, because this time, Luca was in a very good mood when he bought his weekly lottery ticket and thought to himself, I have a feeling this is my lucky ticket. I’m really ready to be a big winner this time. Then he put the ticket in his pocket and forgot about it. In fact, his winning ticket was for last Wednesday’s drawing, but he didn’t even look at it until Saturday to see if he’d won.”

Positive thinking when partnered with positive emotions can change the course of history. In Luca’s case, that one energetic positive thought made his life better, along with the lives of his brother, his son and his niece.  And in turn, their good fortune rubbed off on others close to them.

Law of Attraction1As a strong believer in the Law of Attraction personally, I don’t think, I KNOW that the formula for living a life filled with grace and goodness is to focus on what I want and not what I don’t want. So to that end, I’ve decided to become an “anti-terrorist.” I will replace all thoughts of terrorism and it’s negative effect on my world – with thoughts of altruism and it’s positive effect on my world.

I will focus on kindness – because it works. I will focus on generosity – because it works. I will focus on compassion – because it works. I will focus on gratitude – because it works. I will focus on prayer – because it works.

I have created a little chart for myself to include all my waking hours – and I’ve been setting my phone, hour by hour, to remind me to take an inventory of my thoughts to see if I am keeping to my commitment to focus on a world steeped in altrusim.  So far, unless I was deeply involved in a work process, I have to report that when the alarm sounded, my mind was not focused on the positive ideas dictated by my commitment.  Instead the intoxication of the race-consciousness and the pervasian of media – social and broadcast – had redirected my attention to some upsetting happening taking place in my immediate environment or in my community or my world.

However, I’m still new at this and I am beginning to see improvement. The fact that I am noticing how easily and how often my thoughts are hijacked by negative events or conversations is a step in the right direction. And then, because of my self-imposed interruption, I take am committed to taking an immediate positive step toward my goal. I select one of the five activities contained in my commitment and I act on it no matter what else is going on.

Prayers and Blessings are the easiest activities to grasp quickly.  I always can afford a few seconds to bless a fellow human being, or creature or my planet without even breaking the rhythm of my current task.  I can offer an Affirmative Prayer or make an Affirmation with equal ease, such as I AM A HAPPY, HEALTHY, WEALTHY CHILD OF GOD.  Better yet to shore up my wavering faith – I AM INTIMATELY CONNECTED TO ALL OF THE POWER OF THE UNIVERSE.

The next easiest item in my intention statement to implement would be Gratitude – within my reach are always many things for which to be grateful starting with the tools of my trade – computers, telephones, calendars, pencils, paper, calculators, the Internet.

Sometimes, when the timer goes off I’m in a position to commit to an act of kindness – especially if I happen to be driving or shopping or if  I’m with loved ones.  Acts of Kindness are best accomplished if they are spontaneous.  They can be simple acts like letting someone else have the nearest parking space or my place in line, or a bit more time- consuming, like stopping to help someone that I am awake enough to notice could use a hand. Taking a moment to speak a kind word to someone who is serving me, or to public servant like a police officer or a crossing guard also works and the feel-good factor makes up for the time spent in being kind.

Compassion takes a little more commitment from me.  Observing behavior that I don’t like, such as a parent who is hard on a child, someone who is close to abusing a pet, a driver engaged in road rage, a bully, someone who is intoxicated – doesn’t spontaneously evoke a feeling of compassion in me.  More often I feel more compelled to give that person a piece of my mind in as unfriendly manner as their own – but I know better.  That person is also hurting and my piling on the hurt isn’t going to help either of us.  Compassion doesn’t mean I won’t take an action of some sort to stop the mean act if necessary, but it does mean that in doing so, I must also understand that soul is a victim of his or her own thinking and needs help not blame.

Finally, I understand that generosity is an act that primarily benefits me – if I give in the true nature of altruism – which is to give solely because it feels good.  I can give my time, my talent or my money, as long as I realize that I will receive in turn in the manner I give. So if I’m short of time, it will be helpful for me to give a little bit of the time I have.  If I’m sort of money, money is what I am wise to give.  And if I’m short of any other kind of supply, sharing my own talents will provide me with like talents in the future.  I always have something to give – always – and giving because it feels good simply enhances my overall joy of life.

Have you too been asking what you can do, right now to make life easier, happier, better for yourself and others?  If so you might want to try adopting altruism as your modus operendo for the next little while. Focus on kindness, generosity, compassion, gratitude and prayer and affirmation and you will be so busy harboring positive thoughts, less savory ones will begin to fade out of your existence.  Not only will they, they have no other choice.  You simply can’t be kind, grateful, generous, compassionate and loving – and be unhappy at the same time.





Stirring Up the Chi

The ELF teaches us that we create in three ways – by our thoughts, by our words and by our actions. This might be just the right time of year to create using all three. Mid-winter tends to be a time of low energy for many people. The “fun” part of winter is pretty much over and the four or five weeks the groundhog says we need to wait for spring to arrive feels like the far distant future.

But there are some things , really fun things, we can do to create new energy using thought, words and actions. According to the rules of Feng Shui, the ancient Chinese art of placement, we can create energy by placing in our living and working spaces things that move (or have the potential to move) and in doing so, our internal energy gets a boost as well. You probably already own the things you need to create the element of movement in a new place; so it’s just a matter of thinking about where they may be and deciding how to place them to provide the effect you desire.

bagua(nos)3 Feng Shui also teaches that there are areas in every “space”, whether that “space” is a single room or an entire piece of property, that draw specific types of energy. Using the Bagua map, which defines those spaces, you can see, for example that if you stand at the doorway of your office or the room in your home you wish to energize, holding the map in front of you, that the area that attracts prosperity will be to your far left, the area that enhances relationships to the far right, etc.

Following the guidance of the map, you can bring new energy or “activate the chi” in any area of your room by placing in it an object that moves or has the potential to move. So if you wish to shake up the level of prosperity in your life at the moment, simply identify the area that draws prosperity and place in it a or a musical instrument or a pretty wind chime, a lava lamp or a small fountain. Then sit for a moment and enjoy your newly energized space. Take a minute to recall times in your life when you have felt extremely prosperous and give thanks for those times – out loud if you wish to take full advantage of the energy of the spoken word. Finally, visualize new prosperity pouring in your direction right now and also giving thanks for that.

goldfish2 If it is one or more of your relationships that you wish to energize, add a pair of small plants with soft leaves that move when you touch them, or add a pair of music boxes, a pair of bells, or if you are really serious, a pair of live goldfish or a pair of love birds in their own cage. When the items you choose are in place, sit quietly and recall the best times in past relationships that you can remember and give thanks for them. Then picture the ideal relationships for you right now and give thanks for that as well.

Feeling like you would like to increase your attention to Spirituality? Choose the left hand corner closest to you as you stand at the door of the room and add a water container with a floating candle in it, or burn some incense in that corner. When the candle has been lit or the incense is burning, treat yourself to a few moments of gentle meditation, giving thanks as you release the outer world for the guidance of The ELF in YoursELF, all the time, without fail, 24/7/365, eternally.

Other items that represent movement might include music boxes, ticking clocks, radios, telephones, cd’s and instruments of aroma therapy and of course, pets of every variety. A cat will constantly stir the energy in every corner of every house and dogs bring exciting loving energy wherever they are.

Stirring up the chi is energizing and exciting and uplifting and shopping for the best kinds of energetic items in your own home is great fun. You’ll probably want to carry your bagua map from room to room and stir up the chi in more than one place. And helping a friend who is going through a rough spot to draw some much needed fresh energy can be a true act of kindness – as long as they are open to receiving your unique gift.

To learn more about energizing the chi for other reasons, such as selling a property, or recovering from an illness, you will enjoy Terah Kathryn Collin’s book – The Western Guide to Feng Shui http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B005LB8NDY/ref=dp-kindle-redirect?ie=UTF8&btkr=1